That Just Happened?!?

by SimplySharpe on October 2, 2009

Once upon a time I accepted a position in the illustrious industry known as Inside Sales. Why? I have a mortgage payment.

Process it and please move along for the sake of efficiency (which may be covered later).

When you enter Boiler Room AKA “Inside Sales” you can expect to make a minimum of 80 outbound calls a day. You can also expect to have  a douchebag for a manager who will fill your ears with stories of his awesomeness. Multiply this man. There are many of them. They like to talk. A lot. About themselves. Yawn.

This career path (if you can call it that) is definitely not for everyone. I believe the requirements were tough outer shell with a nugget inner ego. Who can remember after all these scripted conversations? My name is this. I sell you that. We make conversation. I build rapport. You probably generally like me it’s just obvious I lack SalesForce, or the homemade equivalent.

The only details I care to share this point are that I am being paid to harass people and not the other way around. This enters my brain at the very same time I am speaking with a General Manager of an account I have been calling on for weeks.

General Manager:  “I like to party.”

Me: (faster then you could think WTF... and did I just call Cal Naughton, Jr.) “Awesome? Do you party with office supplies

Party Monster: “Sometimes. So, do you like to party?

Me: (That just happened?) “I like to sell office supplies like a robot.

Party Monster: “Blah, blah, blah. Portfolio. Money. Party. Here is my private cell phone number. Don’t give it to anyone, I mean definitely call me because I like to party.”

I don’t know how much more I emailed the DJ, but here is more detailed account from our crackberry exchange earlier:

This is happening in real time. Speaking with GM of company. He is HI-LARIOUS. Man, this guy hits on anyone. We are talking about Johnny’s Hideway! Grab it, love it and keep it a secret, he is saying. WTF?!? That just happened. Lives off Roswell Road. If I don’t stop him I am going to know what his sign is. Wait, I think it may be coming? He is telling me about his PORTFOLIO...”

For the record, I like to write .

Thanks for playing!

 


{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

Eric Lee October 2, 2009 at 10:33 pm

I’ve been reading along for a while now. I just wanted to drop you a comment to say keep up the good work.

The Manimal October 2, 2009 at 10:41 pm

You should have gone to his party. It probably had 4 different kinds of nacho cheese and a Mexican fighting chicken named El Diablo

Eugene October 3, 2009 at 1:22 pm

Haha, funny post.

I loved this retort: “Awesome? Do you party with office supplies”

Question: you’re not working inside sales anymore, right?

SimplySharpe October 3, 2009 at 4:34 pm

Actually, this was yesterday. It literally just happened 🙂

Chris Jordan October 4, 2009 at 8:18 pm

I LOVED reading this!! I too have worked for douchebags in the “boiler room”… and it is partly why I quit to go do my own thing.

And that is the coolest sales call ever!

SimplySharpe October 4, 2009 at 8:22 pm

and you are doing the damn thing! It was a pretty cool, if not highly uncomfortable call.

This comment is paid for by Simply Sharpe Inc…. If you ain’t first, you’re last!

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