Decemberist

I took some time today to reflect on the little things and this is the listicle I came up with:

1. I went to NYC twice this year (for work).

2. I’ve had at least 365 brilliant ideas and the year is not even over yet. Watch out 2012!

3. I would rather be me every day than someone other people expect me to be for even one second.

4. The grass can be the perfect shade of green if you use just enough fertilizer.

5. I may love even numbers, but I still hate math.

6. Sometimes I get accused of being negative when really, I’m just being honest. For those who agree, please refer to number three and feel free to forget my existence.

7. I accidentally dropped a rhyme in that last one. Poetry in motion.

8. I forgot what eight was for.

9. I love being more right-brained.

10. This list was just my silly way of saying, happy first day of the last day of the month.

Tags: December, On being me, Reflection, Silly Sharpe

Rapture Ready… My DJ Debut Brought to You by Twitter

It’s been a while since my last post… blah, blah, blah.

The world is supposedly going to end tomorrow and I saved up all my Simply Sharpe silliness for today. It all started with a tweet:

Then my brain starting burning, kind of like the fires of hell all of us sinners and winners will supposedly feel at some point tomorrow.

I am so Jew-ish, I can barely understand how people can be blasphemous about Le Bible.

I got a little stuck by Starbucks wi-fi, but can’t nobody break my stride.

Then I got a retweet (much like a witness) from the smart people at Rapture Regrets, which lead to this policy of truth.

That’s pretty much how my debut went down. See you at the after party Sunday! I will be in the DJ Booth.

Thanks for playing!

Tags: DJ Debut, No Excuses Tweet Like a Champion, No Regrets, Rapture Ready, Rapture Regrets, Silly Sharpe, Simply Sharpe

Frozen in Time

snOMG 2011

Happy New Year!

It’s hard to believe I have not posted anything since 2010. I resisted the urge to do a proper recap of the year for a variety of reasons. None of which I plan to share or defend.

One of my favorite things about having a personal blog is that I control when the writing occurs. I set the boundaries, I write the content and sometimes I even take photo credit. See example above.

I broke my blogging silence to share my random bottle cap project during the great snOMG of 2011. This is a good indiction of what the future looks like. I am going through old memories and repurposing them. I will also be creating many new ones most likely on a different site.

It will all make more sense soon, but always feel free to leave me questions or comments.

Thanks for playing!

Tags: snOMG

Holy Hollis Gillespie, Great Blogs of Steel

If you live in Atlanta, listen to NPR, watch late night talk shows or have an affinity for “Trailer-evangelism“, you probably know who Hollis Gillespie is. The rest of you are going to love me for the introduction.

I met Hollis when I recently attended an event hosted by the fabulous Crave Atlanta. Hollis is best known for her unique humor, writing three memoirs and her famous Atlanta blogging workshop. Her writing workshops, appropriately titled Shocking Real Life, have been on my short list of definitely maybe.

I wanted to learn more about this author whose Dad was an alcoholic salesman and Mom a missile maker. Other then her obvious accredited work, she was just another person with something to sell me.

Except she wasn’t.

There was nothing sales-y about her. She was wearing a funky orange dress and a Paul Frank watch. She talked about how her logo was creatively transfered on drop cloth. She mentioned the four friends formula — think Seinfeld, Sex And The City, Will and Grace, etc. Hollis shared stories of how she began writing on the back of the drop seat while working for Delta. She wrote herself little notes and reminders of things to detract her from fear.

FEAR — The dirtiest word in my vocabulary.

Can the Workshop Whisperer set me free from fear? Time will tell. The workshop I wanted to sign up for conflicts with my increasingly shocking real life.

Here are some other pictures from Hollis’s studio in Castleberry Hill Loft District:

Trailer Trashed Tanks and Enormous Undergarments

Hollis' Daughter Drew These Trailers

It’s pretty cool if you find yourself in the area or looking for a creative space to host an event. I bet she will even let you hang your own pictures

Tags: Crave Atlanta, Hollis Gillespie, The Workshop Whisperer

The Bucket Stops Here

Today I was catching up on one of my favorite blogs written by a friend and mentor, Todd Schnick, and got inspired. It’s not unusual for me to be inspired by him. I just decided that it was 12:54 AM and seeing that I am still awake, there is no time like the present to act on inspiration.

If you have not already read his post (your personal invitation is in the mail) about creating your own Bucket List, read it now HERE.

I decided there was no reason I could not share my list with my loving readers, especially the ones that complain about my lack of posting.

Like Todd, I have never seen the movie The Bucket List. I will admit to trying to watch it, but it did not hold my attention. I understand this list may not hold yours and you should know it’s subject to change when I have some sleep behind me, but for now in all it’s glory, here is my Bucket List:

1. Write a book

2. Travel to Italy

3. Live outside the states for at least a year

4. Speak a second language fluently (Pig Latin does not count)

5. Have the financial resources to take my entire family on a trip around the world

6. Make a difference in one person’s life without anyone knowing who, what, when, where, why or how

7. Visit all 50 states

8. Move back to the place where it all began, NY

9. Let everyone I know how I feel about them for better or for worse

10. Host a talk show

11. Learn how to DJ

12. Learn how to knit like my Grandma

13. Paint something that I would be proud to hang on my own wall

14. Learn how to use a camera of the non point and shoot variety

15. Be my own tech support

16. Swim with dolphins

17. Run more then a mile

18. Be part of a movie — writing, acting or producing

19. Live in a clutter free, well decorated home

20. Design a line of comfortable, YET ridiculously fabulous shoes

What is on your list? What items on mine can you check off? Did you love every minute?

Tags: Bucket List, Inspired by Todd Schnick, Lists

Plenty of Hair to Spare

Hair There Everywhere - Before Shot

For the last few years I have been avoiding a promise I made not just to myself, but to a very special person that lost her battle with cancer. My promise was to donate my long curly hair to Locks of Love, an organization that provides hairpieces to financially disadvantaged children in the United States and Canada suffering from long-term medical hair loss from any diagnosis.

As you can see from the “Before shot”, I have tons and tons of long flowing curly hair. I’m Jewish. We grow hair like it’s our job.

I remember as a little girl people would stop me and ask if my hair was naturally curly. They would go on and on about how pretty my hair was and how lucky I am. Perms were really big in the 80s and when my Mom did not blow dry my hair straight, I had Shirley Temple ringlets. I was always jealous of all the other girls and their perfectly smooth, straight hair.

It took me years to appreciate the head of hair I was born with. A lot of factors went into my self acceptance, but the most memorable occurred a few years ago. I met a very special lady who had been laid off from her job of 35 years and rehired by my former boss/mentor to be our receptionist. Not long after she joined our team she found out her cancer returned. She had already been through a series of chemo and was in remission.

This time, they found her tumors too late. Her doctors tried experimental and very aggressive forms of treatment. None of them were working. During this time, she came into work everyday despite the obvious toll these treatments and cancer were taking on her body. Her spirits were always high. She never complained even as the industry became so volatile her position as receptionist grew into a much more stressful workload. My old boss had a fax machine and copier moved to her desk so she could still work without having to get up as often. We all took turns giving her breaks even though some of us were not supposed to be sitting at the front desk. You would have done the same thing if you were me. A few of us also took her to doctors appointments when they were giving her treatments that required someone else drive her.

I remember she wore these scarves around her head that seemed so chic to me. She was not fond of them, but she said the wigs got itchy. She had curly hair too, but kept it very short. She always told me how much she loved my hair and how she would pay money to have my curls. I think this was when the appreciation started to really sink in. Not because I did not have to pay money for pretty hair, but because she no longer had a choice that women make when it comes to our hair.

I told her I would give her my hair if we could find a place to make a wig out of it. She laughed. I went on a mission. That is when I hit Googs and learned about Locks of Love. We talked about it and I told her that I was going to donate my hair to them when it was long enough. The required donation is 10 inches. I thought it was really great that in some small way I would be able to help kids who were suffering from the insecurity of not having hair in addition to different illnesses that may be causing them pain.

My hairdresser at the time knew my plan was to donate my hair and warned me that I have a very low hair line and short hair would require some real maintenance on my part. I would have to let my hair grow at least two inches longer then the required amount so she could put it in a pony tail and properly make the cut.

Then I got engaged. In order to have the hair style that I wanted, I need to cut off a few inches. Oy.

Time went by. My friend passed away.

I never forgot about my promise, but I found convenient excuses to keep waiting. I gained some post wedding weight and my long hair balanced me out. My hairdresser got pregnant and took time off to be with her child. Surely, no one else had her hair line understanding and would be able to cut my hair. My face was too round for short hair. Etc. Etc. Etc.

Just over a week ago, I lost my Grandmother. Another very special woman who absolutely adored her hair. She went to weekly appointments at The Beauty Parlor, as she called it. Even when she was in hospice, someone came in to do her hair. It made me think a lot about my promise and inspired me to finally follow through on it.

I have plenty of hair to spare. There is a little girl out there who will love these curls.

As you can see below in the “After Shot”, I ended up with a really cute cut and doing something that made me feel good inside and out.

Cute Cut, Great Cause - After shot

Life is too short to make excuses. Get out there and cut your hair or do whatever the equivalent is for you.

Tags: Hair, Locks of Love, Promises

Writer’s Block vs. Writer’s Hesitation

From the looks of this blog, you may think I have stumbled upon a massive case of writer’s block.

Wrong.

What I am really suffering from is writer’s hesitation.

On a good day, I have up to 4-5 new post ideas. On those same days, I decide what is not worthy based on what other people may or may not think. Is this going to offend so and so, will this blog make me unemployable, is it okay to be honest about what really goes on behind the curtain. etc.

I let other people’s opinions get in my way.

I remember vividly when this all began. I started listening to the sometimes solicited, but mostly unsolicited advice of what a blog is supposed to be and what my writing should focus on. Why don’t I have a niche? Why do I think writing about my life is so important? Why do I not do this or why do I do that with my blog?

Guess what? This is not your blog!

If I wanted to write about my puppy one day and mortgage rates the next, what is stopping me?

Nothing.

I do try to be mindful of my readers and not bore you all to tears with tales of woe (of which there have been too many to count recently). If you are a first time reader you have probably not heard the endless droning about my old blog and how much better it was. One of the main reasons my consistency and content was much more robust is I never took the peanut gallery commentary to heart. I’m not even sure I knew they existed?

I just wrote.

That is what I loved about writing. There are no rules for a blog. There may be more effective ways to get readership and market your blog, but no rules for a personal blog. I would go so far as to say there are no rules for any blog unless you write on behalf of a company (and in that case, be mindful as you represent a brand). My readers are smart enough to exercise good judgement on this one.

The point I am really trying to make here, is I no longer choose to allow writer’s hesitation to affect me.

If you feel my posts are not for you, it takes one click to close the window. Don’t be shy. You even have my personal invitation to leave feedback in the comments on why you will no longer visit my page. I promise to take it all into consideration.

I want to make this last part clear:

What you don’t have is control of what you think I should be writing about. I have sincerely appreciated the feedback in all the forms in which it was received, but I am also ready to seize control of my thoughts, my writing, my desire to post about about anything I see fit.

I may just write about turtles next time. Because. I can.

Thanks for playing!

Tags: The peanut gallery, writing

Just Read a Book

The Girl Behind the Book

Bookstores have always been a weakness of mine. I have always dreamed of wall to wall bookshelves and one day having a library in my house. This weekend, I realized where that dream originated. 

The DJ was playing a gig in South Florida and we literally flew down for 24 hours. I was hesitant to spread the word that we were coming down due to our limited time and the distance between where my family has spread out all over the tri-county area. My father remained determined to see us and rewarded me with two of my favorite ways to pass time… lunch and visit to a bookstore. 

We were walking around the bookstore and he was attempting to catch up with me while I stopped every few minutes to pick up a book and declare I had to have it. When we passed a section with classics like 1984 and Animal Farm I was reminded of my childhood. My father bought me these books before I even knew how to read. By the time I was in middle school and they were assigned reading, I refused because I had already read them. I asked for more challenging assignments. It was not that my Dad ever asked me to dissect the characters in the story or who the Pig or Snowball possibly represented. They just felt like books I read as a child and therefore did not agree with them being considered “homework“. 

I started to tell my father about this and since he had never seen a report card or feedback from a teacher, he found the story amusing. He said (in his adorable South African accent), “Your mother must have had a fit when you did that!“ 

She did.

In fact, every time my Mother had a “fit” I just called my Dad to tell him how intolerable she was. I started to remember how often I called my Father with this information and instead of responding, “Why do you think we are not married anymore?” the only thing I remember him saying is, “Why don’t you just read a book?“. 

Then I would hang up and do just that. I read everything. Mostly young adult novels like pictured above, but I often borrowed books from my Mom’s overflowing collection of self help and psychology. She was studying for her Master’s in Social Work so there was an abundance of these types of books collecting dust next to her battered copy of Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love them. I read that too. 

I then lamented on the fact that there were all these books that I feel like I could have written years ago. My Dad stared at me with genuine sincerity and said he always wondered why I had not written a book yet. I gently reminded him how he and my Mother told me that being an author was a poor career choice and I would never make any money. He paused, took a serious look at me and asked with no trace of irony, “When did you start listening to what we told you to do?”

No pause from me, “Um, every time you told me to read a book, I did!“.

Tags: Bookstores, I heart my Daddy

The Day I Ousted the DJ

Sharing is Caring

Ever had a day that seemed to have a theme? Today appeared to be brought to me by Foursquare. 

If you have managed to find the one rock left to live under (Pass Go and collect $200), you are scratching your head wondering what a Foursquare is? I believe sharing is caring, so let’s talk a little about this location based social networking site currently swiffering the nation. All you need is a mobile phone or text enabled device type thing and you can play.

Why would you want to join another social network site, you ask (Yes, I can hear your thoughts. My ESPN is all the way on)?  This one comes with benefits and badges along with discounts from businesses that participate in the game. You can also find out where your friends are, allow them to stalk you, meet you out for dinner or drinks or give you tips around town. It’s a really cool fun way to play with your friends and do your part in supporting businesses or providing them feedback you may not necessarily give face to face. There are many reasons to play and you can learn more here.

Why does this day remind me of Foursquare? It all started in a parking garage in Midtown, Atlanta. I pulled in with my usual expectations of parking on one of the upper levels visitor parking spaces. I remember getting out of the car and getting my Foursquare application ready to check in. The Blackberry app will locate businesses within a few mile radius and let you select from the list.  The coffee shop I was going to check in at was not entered so I put all my energy into proactively getting my game on.

I went on to get a lack luster Chai Tea Latte and headed up the elevator to the top floor of my fabulous new digs. Cubed as I am, I love being in a fun office space with other creatives. I checked in there too, though some people think business check ins are not cool. I am not one of those people, providing you work in an office that does not offer a deal for services based on check ins. In other words, if you work at a bar or boutique you are banned from checking in so you don’t waste a hookup for a patron. 

Do a little Google (Topeka) magic on the subject and you will see a lot of people weigh in on their rules of checking in. To each his own on this, unless you cheat or add a duplicate record because you are too lame to double check your venue or do not spell it properly. The one thing I do get ornery about is when people add silly records like the highway or toll booth plazas. These clutter up the game and could be dangerous if you are driving while checking in. 

Public safety announcements aside, I finally found a new reason to not complain about all the random entries. I LOST my car! I played the part of space cadet for at least 15 minutes (a role I play well despite my high IQ) walking between levels to remember where my car may have been parked? I realized at that moment had I checked in on Level 11 of the parking garage, I would be getting in my car and not playing hide and go seek with it. Novel concept. I shared my moment of clarity with the DJ who thought this was cute.

I finally found my four wheel friend and took my show on the road (pun not intended, but it did work there). As I drove around to run errands, I got stuck behind this hotrod of horse power that seemed to think brushing her hair was more important then pushing the gas pedal. I was befuddled. I wanted her to check in on the side of the road and put a stop to this Marsha Brady 100 strokes a day hair brushing. She should have her hotrod privileges revoked and give that baby to someone one who will drive like she means it. Not me. I already lost one car today.

She finally got moving with her bad self and I was able to drive along to DSW where I had buyers rewards and would ultimately check in on Foursquare. I was on a specific mission for wedges and sandals and felt the best way to maintain accountability would be to shout that on my check in. Goal = wedges and sandals, must ignore heels. It’s a hard one for me. Higher the heel, happier the girl. 

Feeling fabulous and footloose (Again, she goes with the pun. I mean really?), I message the DJ that I am feeling very girly today. He responded with matched enthusiasm and *gasp* a grocery list. I said girly, not “to-do girly”? Or worse… domestic. 

I decide to take the list and own it. Best. Decision. EVER. 

I ousted the DJ as Mayor of Publix on Foursquare!!!! He has like 64 million check ins there and of all the days to take the title, I get the one themed Foursquare day or as it will now be known, the day I ousted the DJ and he still cooked me dinner.

Tags: Foursquare, I Ousted the DJ

I Pity the Fool

The Search Engine Formerly Known as Google

As everyone on the planet most likely already knows, Google is infamous for it’s logo changing behavior. Just another thing to love about everybody’s favorite search engine. Today being April Fool’s Day and all, Google has the perfect opportunity to really get creative with the logo.

Quite Frankly, not a very witty one though we know my heart and search will always belong to the GOOGs (or Topekans as they are now called).

Instead of just decorating the logo, Google one upped itself and changed the whole name! Their new name, Topeka. Underneath the magic search bar (where I always feel lucky) is the following sentence:

Not in Kansas: learn about our new name.

When you click the link, you are directed to Google’s blog which I am kind enough to screen shot for those who bypass the above link. 

Google Blog

 The blog was posted at midnight (dead giveaway) announcing the BIG name change to Topeka. There is no question that the post is very tongue in cheek and any person with a brain (Yes, I too am thinking of the Scarecrow from the Wizard of Oz and humming along to his song…Kansas… Topeka…hahaha) would see the obvious attempt at April Fool’s humor.

Except an exceptionally bright human being who happens to work with the DJ. Try not to be jealous. I know I am.

During the malaise of my day, I get a seemingly random message from the DJ announcing Mr. Brains on the Ground was going to buy stock in Topeka. Thank GOD I Google every morning or this news would have sounded even more ridiculous (No offense, Kansas).

Apparently, he ran around the office sharing the news of the big boom that was about to hit the market. Google has changed it’s name to Topeka! Eureka! He was going to get in cheap before the others notice the name change.

BRILLIANT!

You may remember me writing about his awesomeness before? He is infamous for celebrating fake birthdays (bless his heart) and many accidentally comedic moments his team shares a C’mon Son! over. In my humble, half witted Topekan opinion, I think this one takes the cake (pun completely intended if you went back and did your homework on the old blogs).

I pity the fool who is immune to sarcasm. You may want to cut your losses and move on to another blog.

Thanks for playing!

Another Not So Random Disclaimer: This blog in no way represents one of the many people who graciously pay me to work for them or any of the organizations they represent. I have changed names to protect the adorably clueless and their affiliation with the DJ is purely coincidental. It is also in no way a representation of his company or the cast of crazy people that may work with him if they were to be identified in a lineup. In fact, non of this has anything to do with anyone and unless you are a lawyer or current employer why are you still reading this little waste of space? Is it your birthday? I will bake you a cake! Meet me in the conference room in Topeka. I’ll be the one wearing the “I heart Google shirt and all I got was this silly blog post”.

Tags: April Fool's Day, Brains on the Ground, Dead Giveaway, Fake Birthdays, Google Logo, Not in Kansas, Office Antics, Topeka, True Story